Linda D. States – Sacramento Divorce Lawyer

Hope is an important component in determining whether a California marriage is going to last. This was one of the findings of a study conducted by the University of Washington in 1992. It found that participants who were disillusioned or disappointed about their marriages were likely to be divorced within three years of the study taking place. Couples therapists have also noted that those who are disillusioned with their relationships are likely to get divorced.

This is because a marriage takes effort, and those who are not hopeful about the relationship are unlikely to put in that work. This is true in cases where both partners are not happy or in cases where only one is unhappy. Typically, unhappy spouses are disappointed that their marriages did not turn out the way they thought they would. Generally, once a person loses hope, they become resigned to the fact that the relationship is over.

Although a marriage has come to an end, it doesn’t necessarily mean that the ex-spouses will no longer need to see each other. If a couple has children, they will be obligated to work together to raise them, assuming that they are both capable of doing so. Furthermore, some divorced couples live together to save money or until their home sells.

An attorney may help an individual work out an agreement with a former spouse as to how to split marital property such as a home. It may also be possible for an attorney to help a parent obtain rights to their child, such as overnight visitation or even custody rights. As an alternative to litigation, a divorce may be settled through mediation.

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When you go through a divorce, you may turn to social media to vent or seek validation, comfort and advice. However, social media also has its drawbacks, making it not the wisest place to be during this emotionally and legally vulnerable time. Anything you say or do online can become evidence against you in your divorce case.

Misinterpretation happens

While you may understand the importance of not sharing information about your love life or photos of your extravagant vacation, what can be the harm of just posting a picture of you and your children together? Unfortunately, your spouse can turn even the most innocent of status updates or photos into ammunition against you, such as accusing you of trying to manipulate the children or ruin his or her reputation. A judge does not know you personally and only uses the information available to make a decision. 

Privacy is not a guarantee

You may have a handle on privacy settings and know better than to friend a stranger, but these do not guarantee 100 percent security. Policies change often and glitches can happen. Your friends may also share your posts and photos, including in private messages, and their privacy settings may be different from yours. Anyone who has access to your profile can take screenshots of your page. Once you post something, it is out of your control. 

Posts are permanent

Just as you have probably told your own teenage kids, anything you put on the internet is permanent. Even if you delete a comment or photo or use an app like Snapchat, ways exist to bring things back. Furthermore, as mentioned above, your post may have already reached farther corners of the web, making a deletion on your end not totally effective anyway. It is best to stay off social media for now and seek solace from loved ones in person or through phone calls or to see a therapist.

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The development of a post-divorce budget is an essential first step. This process allows people to see exactly what their monthly bills for housing, food, transportation, insurance and utilities will be. Divorcees might need to consider debts as well. Creditors might try to collect debts that were jointly held during the marriage. People should monitor their credit reports and watch out for unexpected liabilities.

Even if income becomes constrained, people still need to save. Jobs that offer 401(k) retirement plans offer a way to deduct savings directly from pay. Boosting the amount deducted could eventually restore retirement savings lost during a divorce.

People who named spouses as beneficiaries in their wills should not overlook the need to select new designations. This same advice applies to beneficiary designations on life insurance policies and other financial accounts.

In addition to seeking out financial advice, a person might want legal representation. An attorney could inform someone about his or her rights to marital and nonmarital property when negotiating a divorce settlement. Distributions from a settlement might also produce tax consequences, and a lawyer could alert a person to this issue. During a contentious divorce, an attorney might buffer someone from a hostile ex-partner. This service might limit confrontations and keep negotiations focused on the future instead of old battles. If former spouses cannot come to terms privately, then a lawyer could prepare the case for court and strive to present clear information that might produce a fair ruling.

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According to a study conducted by the Center for Retirement Research, households that have been through a divorce have a net financial wealth that is 30 percent lower than similar households that have not undergone a divorce. The results of the study also show that divorced individuals have a 5 percent greater chance of depleting their assets. However, these statistics do not seem to apply to single women.

Single women who have been divorced seem to have the same degree of retirement readiness as women who have never been married. The reason that women seem to avoid the trend of not having enough money for retirement that plagues other groups is real estate.

After a divorce, women tend to have the children and the costly expenses associated with raising them. They also tend to have the family home, with which they build home equity. Women can use that home equity to bolster their finances for retirement

A family law attorney may work to protect the rights and interests of clients who are going through a divorce. After evaluating the factors surrounding a client’s divorce, the attorney may engage in litigation or negotiation to obtain favorable settlement terms regarding divorce legal issues like child custody, spousal support and child support. The attorney might also advocate on behalf of clients regarding the division of assets, such as retirement funds.

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Both children and parents might need to revise their plans. For example, a child may want to consider attending a state school instead of an expensive private one. Parents may want to look into what kind of loans, scholarships and grants might be available. Generally, a parent cannot be forced to pay for graduate school or a particularly expensive education. Divorce agreements that include plans to pay for child support usually limit the time period.

Another option is a 529 plan. This allows savings to accumulate tax free, and there are no taxes on withdrawals that are used for education. A 529 plan is usually owned by one parent who has the ability to withdraw funds or change the beneficiary, so the other parent may want the divorce agreement to specify the purpose of the plan.

Making sure a child’s college education is paid for may be one way that parents can help protect children during a divorce. Most of the time, it is also a good idea for parents to try to avoid conflict in front of their children and encourage the child’s relationship with the other parent. Parents may find that negotiating child custody and other agreements involving their children results in a more harmonious coparenting relationship than going to court. The agreement can then be made legally binding. If parents need to change some aspect of the divorce agreement later, they can go to court to ask for a modification.

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People might also want to gather all financial documents and make copies of them. Later, if the divorce become acrimonious and these documents are in the spouse’s control, it might become much more difficult to obtain them. People may also want to get copies of credit reports and correct any erroneous information before the divorce is underway. This can also be an opportunity to review joint accounts and ensure that a spouse is not misusing them. If the couple also shares a joint bank account, a person might want to open an individual one.

It is also important to be prepared for how taxes may change. A divorce financial adviser might be able to advise a person on whether taxes will be due on assets sold or divided during the divorce. An attorney and a therapist might also be helpful professionals at this time.

A person who has not worked outside the home or whose income is much lower than that of the other spouse might want to talk to an attorney about what a divorce may mean financially. Since California is a community property state, unless the couple has signed a prenuptial agreement, the lower-earning spouse should still be able to claim half of most assets acquired after marriage. The spouse may also be entitled to receive temporary alimony.

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Some experts have indicated that many domestic abusers attempt to seek control of the situation by seeking child custody. These experts use the term “coercive control,” which can include tactics such as emotional abuse, abuse of the legal process to harass a former partner, financial abuse and stalking. When abusers receive custodial rights, they might hurt or manipulate the child and attempt to alienate them from the other parent. In some cases, the abusive parent will constantly criticize or attack the ex in order to undermine their relationship with the child. In more severe cases, the abuser may threaten to physically harm the other parent.

Family court judges do not always consider histories of domestic abuse relevant to making custody decisions. This can be especially true when there has not been prior police involvement or a record with the criminal justice system. Instead, current practice in family court is to emphasize joint custody in order to support the involvement of both parents in a child’s life. Any expressed desire to be part of a child’s life is often viewed favorably in family court.

Advocates have urged legislative changes to include histories of abuse when making custody determinations. In the meantime, however, family court is the decisive area for a parent who is dealing with an abusive partner. A family law attorney can represent an abused spouse throughout the divorce and provide strong representation in seeking full custody.

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Workplace retirement plans, which include conventional pensions and 401(k) accounts, can only be divided through qualified domestic relations orders. Without a QDRO, an ex-spouse would not be able to legally access the portion of the funds to which they may be entitled.

Even though it is based on information in the divorce decree, the QRDO is a separate legal document. Therefore, the couple’s attorneys should contact the retirement plan’s administrator to verify the proper procedure for having a smooth transfer of the retirement funds. Before the document is filed with the court, it should be thoroughly reviewed to make sure that its contents are in line with what is stipulated in the divorce agreement. Multiple QDROs will be necessary if there is more than one retirement account that has to be divided as each account requires its own order.

Furthermore, the QDRO should stipulate if the 401(k) funds are to be moved to a rollover IRA. Since such a transaction is considered to be a trustee-to-trustee transfer, neither the recipient or the holder of the 401(k) account will be liable for any taxes.

A divorce attorney may advise clients about what steps to take to ensure that retirement assets are divided in a way that limits taxes and penalties. In addition, legal counsel could file the appropriate court documents regarding the division of the retirement assets.

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